CARD: The Tunnel

This is the actual site that The Tunnel card is based on. This is a tunnel that a road used to run through as there is a railroad track that used to run across the top. The road now dead ends at the tunnel because it is not passable and trains no longer travel across the rail here. There is much local lore about the tunnel and possible paranormal activity inside it.

This picture is taken about 8:30 in the morning just inside the tunnel, looking toward the other end. As I stood in the tunnel, there was a very distinct noise, about as loud as a voice during normal talk. It sounded like a train in the distance or perhaps a roar. Outside the tunnel the noise could not be heard. There were also periodically metallic tinging like noises of unknown origin.

As I stood with my back to the tunnel for a picture my niece observed a line of weird swirling mist at the opposite end of the tunnel. The line of mist was positioned exactly where my camera battery drained. As we drove away from the tunnel I checked my camera and it was fully charged again.

Working on the Journey Deck

I've put this deck away for a couple months because I was getting some anxiety from trying to work out cards. The deck has quite a few VERY strong cards that I am completely satisfied with....the meanings are good, well developed and "feel" right. They read well in the readings I have done with the "draft deck".

Then there are some cards that seem too vague or just don't seem to fit. There's nothing really wrong with them but when ever they come up in a reading I cringe because I don't really feel connected to them nor do they seem to fit particularly well. These are mostly the cards that I "created" to fit the deck...when I had a good number of my experience cards defined I felt an urge to get a full deck so that I could start practice reading....so I added ones that made sense to me and a few represented some memory or idea from family history BUT not really a strong one. This I soon discovered was a mistake...which is why I am reworking and rethinking the deck....

Some cards like the ones I've written about....The Little Man in the Attic, The Little Woman, even the Hell Hounds....those are all strong and read well. So my goal for this week is to go back through the cards and the card list and pull ONLY those that are strong and seem to speak to me. The rest will be set aside and then I will continue SLOWLY this time to round out the deck with more meaningful selections....

After I do the card sort....I'll pop back in here later in the week and list the cards that are being kept as part of the deck....so you will be able to see the beginning of the Journey Deck....and get a glimpse of the weird family history and strange occurances...

The Saga of the Little Woman Continues

Okay the last time I wrote about the little woman I described what I remembered from my childhood and mentioned that that was not the only encounter or story about this seemingly benign spirit (for lack of a better word).

Years later when my mom was sharing unusual stories of an ummmm...we shall say supernatural nature...I mentioned the Little Woman story...and it was then that I discovered that my odd experience was not the first nor the last visit. Describing for me in vivid detail she talked about her first knowledge of the little old woman...when my sister Connie was a baby....still in a basinett beside the bed.It seems that mom had come slowly awake and realized that someone was standing beside the basinett. Her heart was gripped with fear even though to her the lady looked quite angelic. She worried that her presence at the baby's bedside meant that she was going to die.

It was only after weeks and weeks of unease that she was able to put those thoughts aside. After contemplation she came to the conclusion that the little woman represented a family guardian or spirit. She only came to this conclusion quite a while later after hearing about similar visits that the woman made to my aunts who lived in Kansas City Missouri but that is a tale for another day.

Originally Posted at Ginger's Journey June 20, 2008

When the Macabre is the Norm

Oh perhaps macabre is not the right word to use. Ghastly? Perhaps some of the events that unfolded years ago on that small patch of ground were macabre but not all. No not all by any means. Some were simply "interesting."

One such encounter was the story of the stone. It is a story that goes back even further in time. In the days when my mother was a young girl. It transpired not on the farm itself but in some adjacent woods that were about five miles from the Silent Woods themselves. Five miles as a crow flies. It was in those woods, covered in brambles, the ground hidden from the light of day by the dense branches hanging overhead, that my grandmother discovered the stone.

The stone was large and flat and smooth. Nestled there is the green moss of the spring woods it glistened and beckoned. "What a perfect stone for the flower bed." must have been what my grandmother thought as she gazed upon it. For it was smoother than one would expect in the deep woods far from the river to the north.

With hands on hips she stood towering over it. It looked heavy and it was slightly buried in the damp soil. But grandmother was not one to be daunted by the need for muscle. Hard work was no stranger to her and so she stooped without a second thought and tugged at the stone. It did not break away from the ground easily but when it did, she gasp and stepped back quickly, covering her ears with her hands.

For as she lifted the stone, the distant sounds of screaming voices reached her ears. Voices, she described later that were like those one would imagine in the bowels of hell. With shrieking, and moaning, and gnashing of teeth. Cries of agony, begging for release. So strong and real that she quivers in telling the story.

In the woods that day, she shoved the stone securely back in place and moved quickly through the damp darkness of the woods. For evening was approaching and she wished even less to find herself in these woods at night then she had earlier.

The Woods are Calling

" The woods are calling today." Not sure what it means or even what I mean...but as I was mulling things over and getting ready to start the day...that phrase just sort of appeared out of no where...and I wanted to write it down before I forgot it. I'm short on time this morning but I'll come back and elaborate more later...

CARD: The Little Woman Part 1

Okay I am going to start the story of the Little Woman but I am going to do it in several parts because the story of the Little Woman unfolds over a period of quite a few years, takes place in a couple different locations, and was told to me in bits and pieces by many different people. I am going to start the story from long ago in my childhood.I can't remember my exact age but I know I was pretty young...possibly about 4-6 years old. I know this because when I was young there was a twin sized bed in my parents bedroom that I slept in. I suppose a few nights I actually fell asleep in the bed but more often I fell asleep in my mom's bed and was later transferred to the twin sized bed. My father worked second shift and arrived home about 1:30 or so.

One night I was snuggled in bed next to my mom, I know it was late because she was sleeping soundly. For some unknown reason I awakened, and could feel quite distinctly someone standing on the foot of the bed. I, at first, felt no fear as I assumed it was my father crawling into bed, although quite honestly I had never known him to actually STAND on the bed but merely to crawl into it. So a bit groggily I pushed the blanket from around my face with every intention of protesting the move into the twin bed. When I looked up I was amazed and yes in this case frightened.

Standing on the foot of the bed was a little "old" woman about 4 feet tall with long flowing hair. To me the hair appeared gray or silver but others have described it as blonde. I looked at her for several seconds and she was smiling down at me quite benignly. But none the less, in the tradition of all small children, I immediately pulled the covers over my head and stayed very still. I do not remember how long I stayed there still and quiet beneath the covers, I have no conscious memory of the woman leaving but eventually I must have fallen asleep.

Now the woman did not appear threatening but for a small child, even one growing up on a haunted farm, it is quite startling to find someone you do not know standing on the foot of your bed in the middle of the night, when the room is dark and the silence seems to hover. I can't remember talking to my mother about it the next day but I must have because years and years later we had a conversation about this very event and she had some interesting information to add to the story of the Little Woman.

For this was not the first time the Little Woman had visited, and little known to me at the time of that particular conversation, it would not be the last. But more details about that piece of the story in Part Two.

Originally Posted on Ginger's Journey April 2008

Continued in Part Two

The Other World

Exploring the wide world of the internet...I came upon Chris's post about the Invisibles over at Tarot Eon. This has me pondering again the unusual aspects of the farm and the events that unfolded there. Some I am only beginning to touch on. None are like the Amittyville Horror (thanks goodness) but rather a gentle ebb and flow. I will not deny the fright of some of the instances, nor the possibility that some of the "spirits" were evil, angry, or bad. Simply that our experiences, while sudden, freaky, and a bit unnerving, were not terror producing. They didn't haunt our sleep, or wake us at three in the morning with a sense of foreboding, or any other ghost story cliche. They simply existed right along with us. Eerie at times but usually put out of mind as day to day life continued.

The post The Invisibles, opened another way of thinking for me. The Shamanism that Chris writes about proposes not two different worlds (this one and the next) but rather a world divided, as visible and invisible. The thing is I wrote about a sensation that could be linked to this in a rather rambling post one day over at Ginger's Journey...I can't seem to put my finger on it at the moment but it was a post about how at times in my life I have this odd sensation that something is hurdling at me through the darkness...and I proposed that it was "another me" in another reality. Well it was more complex than that but you get the idea.. Not exactly what is meant by the "invisibles" but still my mind leaps from one to the other so perhaps what I am describing is actually some "transferance" between the two worlds and I am some how sensing it.

Then thinking about that led to me thinking about the farm...Could the events there have actually been the "invisible world" appearing to us in bits and pieces or in flashes so to speak...so that the two worlds co-exist but at times collide. It seems to at least be something to consider along with the more "traditonal" view that what we saw were ghosts and they were from the "next world". In fact, it might explain the ebb and flow quality of the events, as well as the absence of being terrified.

CARD: Hell Hounds

Well you knew I had to get back to the whole haunted farm saga eventually...I'll continue with the little old woman saga another time...because I just watched something on Monster Quest that seriously got me thinking about the hounds of hell...that roamed the farm from the Silent Woods all the way back to the bluff road. They were hunted by many but shot by none.

Monster Quest is not typically a show I watch. It's on the History Channel which pretty much explains my disinterest in it. However my husband does watch it and one day from absolute boredom I sat down and watched an episode...it happened to be about the Chupacabra which actually has its origins in two different places...Texas and Puerto Rico. The version sighted in Puerto Rico is described as two legged and more reptilian like while the sightings in Texas describe a dog/wolf like creature with huge fangs and almost no hair.

According to the show several have even been shot and some DNA testing is being conducted. The first reported sightings of the creatures were in 1995.The episode reminded me of the Hounds of Hell...and make me curious as to their origins. Described as jackel like they do not necessarily sound like the hairless, dry roughed skinned Chupacabra...but it just makes me think...if there are creatures out there roaming that are either a "new animal" or a disformed animal that reproduces in kind then maybe the Hounds of Hell were a freak of nature rather than supernatural....ummm although it hardly explains how they could disappear from one hill side to appear on another...or how they so swiftly avoided bullets.None the less the world holds many unexplained things...whether of this world or another!

CARD: The Silent Woods

Okay as promised...more info about the Haunted Farm where I grew up...Have you ever suddenly felt like something was wrong...just an odd sensation that things are not as they should be...perhaps you pause for a minute to try and put your finger on just what is out of sync? Perhaps you remain puzzled by the eerie feelings that tumble about inside you or maybe just maybe you slowly start to realize just why you are experiencing this odd reaction. That's exactly how those of us that lived there...came to recognize the Silent Woods.

I'm not sure I know the exact moment of discovery because obviously being the youngest there were many others before me that puzzled out the woods. On the farm toward the back part of the property...in fact the Silent Woods extend and cross the property line just slightly into another person's woods...this section of woods are remarkably, eerily SILENT. I know you will find it very hard to believe but when walking in those woods the only sounds present are the sounds being made by the person walking...the rustling of leaves, the snapping of small twigs, conversation if any occurs during the encounter with the woods. No birds, no squirrels scampering in dry leaves, no buzzing bees or chirping crickets. Just a vast quiet stillness.

On the last day before the farm passed out of our possession and into a non family member's ownership, we walked in the Silent Woods one last time. We joked uneasily about the woods, and kicked the leaves and shouted into the still air. Producing as much noise as possible in this forest of overgrown vines, broken branches, and gnarled trees. Toward the back as we crossed over the rusty fence into land we did not own...we discovered a very old, very large tree with an uncanny opening in it. The opening where the tree had split open was almost large enough to stand inside...but not quite...so I stuck my head in and called out to my niece and daughters that I was looking into the darkness of the inner earth...I kicked my legs and screamed that I was being pulled into the darkness. Which promptly had my niece (who is in her 30s) demanding that I get my head out of the strange tree and return to the group immediately.

My own two daughters (26 and 17 at the time) who did not have an intimate personal knowledge of the farm...laughed and made light. It was only later that a conversation about Wicker Man arose and sent shivers up my spine as I let my imagination slip dangerously into that area of "what if".I sometimes wonder that since the woods are no longer in our ownership if the strange phenomena still occurs....was the force that created the absence of sound...directly related to the location and the woods themselves or in some way linked to my family who had lived there for many many years.

The reason I wonder this is because of the little woman that has visited many in our family...and not just at the farm itself but in other locations...from Kansas City to St Louis and perhaps beyond...that is only as far as my research has lead me to trace the appearance. I don't really think the woman is related to the Little Man in the Attic but I can't be sure. She commonly is seen when there is a new baby in the house and I like to think that she is a gentle family spirit blessing the new life.....but I have no way of knowing that.

Anyway the story of the little woman and how I came to realize that I am not the only one that was visited by her is a story for another day. So for tonight...goodnight and in that twilight zone between the waking world and the dreaming world may you only encounter those that enrich and enlighten your life. Sleep Tight!

Originally Posted at Ginger's Journey, April 2008

CARD: The Little Man in the Attic

Once before when I answered the challenge about writing ten unusual things about myself....I included the fact that I grew up on a "haunted farm". Well. I suppose it is not exactly a "fact" in the truest sense of the word but none the less, ask my brothers, sisters, or nieces or nephews and they will tell you...the farm was haunted. I know there are those that do not believe in such things...and that is fine but the truth is explaining the unusual happenings on that small plot of land is easier described by hauntings as in any other way. If you have a different explanation that will fit the happenings then I will be happy to consider it.

I will talk about the "little man in the attic" and how I came to discover that others knew of his existence just as I did. Here is the thing...in that age between childhood and adulthood where the memories are fuzzy and you can never be sure if what you are remembering is a true memory, a dream, or a distortion of some other memory. That is where the little man lived for many many years because I never spoke of him, described him or even wondered about his existence. It wasn't out of fear for there appeared to be nothing to fear about him. He was simply "there" in the attic. Sometimes he climbed in and out the window onto the roof with a pick...yes just like the dwarves in Snow White. Ummm...you say a childhood memory distorted by Disney? I think not...and here is why. I have never really doubted the little man's existence and I try to pinpoint exactly how long I knew he lived there.

In truth, I'm not sure but for as long as I have a conscious memory of the house. It was only after entering adulthood and putting the whole thought of the little man out of my mind that I stumbled upon the fact that others knew him also. My sister, who has since passed away, was talking with me one day about the farm, the house, and our childhood, when she asked quite matter a factly about the attic. "The attic" I answered and then with a dawning thought I said..."oh are you talking about the little man who lived there" and she nodded. For she too, knew of the little man and also reported no real fear of him or his comings and goings. During our conversation she also revealed to me that she had also asked my brother if he had ever thought anything odd of the attic ....to which he promptly responded, "oh you mean that little man that lived up there?"

Now I suppose with some rationalization we could come up with the answer to why at least three people have the exact same memories of the little man in the attic...down to the clothes he wore, his comings and goings, and the feelings associated with him neither fear or even curiosity....just an acceptance that he was "there". I, personally find it odd, but then again I can add to it the other numerous goings on both in the house itself and in the woods surrounding it. So let's just say that even though the fairies story...which I have yet to share with you...did end with a visit to the psych ward...it did start at the farm....and well....it just makes me wonder.....but more about that later...

NOTE: Orignally Posted on Ginger's Journey, March 2008

The Beginning

I started working on The Journey deck last fall. It all started with my love of the Faeries Oracle by Jessica MacBeth and Brian Froud. Playing with the deck sort of sparked off my creative thought process. Then add to that my wonderful rich history of the "supernatural" (for lack of a better word) and I thought....hmmmm....might those life experiences be developed into a deck. As a personal deck, I felt I would have a strong connection to the cards and also an instant ability to read them easily...because I already knew the stories they were based on...

Well after working on the "ideas" for the cards for a few months...life got busy and time just sort of escaped me...I used index cards to create a "draft" copy of the deck so I could play around with reading with them and perhaps get a better feel for missing elements. Then I sort of
"put them to the side" for a time as other interests and responsibilites came up...

Now it's almost autumn again and I feel the need to get back to the project...along with the help of "my team"...consisting of my nieces who lived some of the experiences and my daughters who lived some of them but have also heard the tellings and retelling many times. They all helped develop the draft cards the first go around. This time I will also be adding my sister into the mix as we strive to fully articulate the stories and meanings behind the cards. In my mind we will journey together as we relive, laugh and maybe cry over the tales that unfold in the process of this very personal creation.

This is a personal deck and as such its development is a personal endeavor. It is not really a venture to produce and publish a deck. Simply a way of celebrating a history that includes some quite unique and interesting aspects. I mean when you grow up on a haunted farm...there's just a whole lot of stuff that happens...and as a woman of "age" I think it is a wonderful way to pass down family history and leave a "mark" so to speak in much the same way that a scrapbook does.

If my team wants authorship rights on the blog...that can be set up...and as we meet, reflect, laugh and share...we will build a deck that fully explains, The Journey.